Anyone have any good clean jokes?

savedjustasiam · #1 12-21-2005, 09:44 PM

I want to hear some clean jokes, anyone??

water5 · #2 02-05-2006, 01:54 PM

Did you read the one about the kids playing Rock music? - Boy, I just realized how old this thread is!

savedjustasiam · #3 02-06-2006, 01:03 PM

No

water5 · #4 02-06-2006, 07:28 PM

Ok - I posted it somewhere else - actually got it from a mom on a different forum: Something along these lines:

CHILDREN PLAYING ROCK MUSIC
A little girl was pounding on the piano as her mom folded the laundry. After some particularly loud bangs her mom asked her what in the world she was playing.
"Oh, I'm just playing some rock music" the little tot replied.
The mother looked down with concern and saw...

...a rock on the piano.

savedjustasiam · #5 02-06-2006, 07:45 PM

That was; well, something!

water5 · #6 02-07-2006, 03:15 PM

Fine - YOU tell one!

savedjustasiam · #7 02-07-2006, 07:10 PM

A man and his wife, now in their 60's, were celebrating their 40th
wedding anniversary. On their special day a good fairy came to
them
and said that because they had been so good that each one of
them
could have one wish. The wife wished for a trip around the world
with
her husband.

Whoosh! Immediately she had airline/cruise tickets in her hands.
The
man wished for a female companion 30 years younger..
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Whoosh...immediately he turned ninety!!!

water5 · #8 02-07-2006, 07:28 PM

That was...welll, something.

JUST KIDDING! I chuckled. Ok - tell another? I love a good joke.

savedjustasiam · #9 02-08-2006, 08:45 PM

> >
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> >A man was walking home alone late one foggy night, when he hears
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> >BUMP...
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> >BUMP...
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> >BUMP... behind him.
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> >Walking faster, he looks back and through the fog he
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> >makes out the image of an upright casket banging its
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> >way down the middle of the street toward him
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> >BUMP...
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> >BUMP...
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> >BUMP...
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> >Terrified, the man begins to run toward his home,
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> >the casket bouncing quickly behind him ...
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> >faster...
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> >faster...
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> >BUMP...
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> >BUMP...
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> >BUMP...
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> >He runs up to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door,
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> >rushes in, slams and locks the door behind him.
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> >However, the casket crashes through his door, with the lid of
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> >the casket clapping ...
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> >clappity-BUMP...
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> >clappity-BUMP...
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> >clappity-BUMP...
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> >..............................on the heels of the terrified man.
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> >Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, the man locks himself in.
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> >His heart is pounding; his head is reeling; his breath is
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> >coming in sobbing gasps.
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> >With a loud CRASH the casket breaks down the door.
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> >Bumping and clapping toward him.
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> >The man screams and reaches for something, anything...
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> >but all he can find is a bottle of cough syrup!
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> >Desperate, he throws the cough syrup at the casket...
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> >and,
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> >(hopefully your're ready for this!!!)
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> >...............the coffin stops.

water5 · #10 02-08-2006, 08:49 PM

Didn't even guess the end! Another! Another!

Ok - guess it's my turn.
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Why did the blond get fired from the M+M candies company?
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...She kept throwing away all the "W"s.